A response to Bill Nolan

Two days before Christmas I was driving southbound through an intersection on a green light when a car going north made a left turn, failed to yield the right of way, and collided with my vehicle full force. Both my front and side airbags deployed. I was dazed and my car door had to be pried open by the police officer on the scene. My car was totaled. The Minneapolis impound towed it away, proof of insurance was provided by both sides, and the other driver was able to drive away in his car while I was given a ride home in the back of a police car.

I never realized how much a car accident could disrupt one's schedule of events and "things to do." I am an Old Catholic priest, and the accident occurred while I was on my way to drop off eighty-three packages of underwear (collected from the community I serve, Cornerstone Old Catholic Community) and to celebrate an Advent prayer service at the Glenwood residence for chronic late-stage adult alcoholic men. In retrospect, it's kind of humorous to imagine myself getting into the back of a police car carrying a Kohl's bag full of eighty-three packages of "tighty-whities" and my breviary.

The police report later confirmed that I was not at fault. My only consolation at that point was the fact we both had the same insurance company and all would work itself out. At least that's what I thought … I do not carry full coverage car insurance, not because I do not want to, but because I cannot afford it. I was depending on the other driver's insurance to help me out.

Finally, I received a call from the insurance company informing me that the other driver showed false information at the accident scene because he had no insurance. He had failed to pay on his policy and the company had dropped him. Long story short, I had to pay $410 to get my vehicle out of the Minneapolis impound lot and towed back to my home, and there would be no financial compensation for my totaled vehicle. I was without a vehicle for a month because I couldn't afford to rent one. The new one I finally bought is a far cry from my totaled 1998 Volkswagen Jetta. In all, I have had to spend well over $1,000 because of the other driver's carelessness and irresponsibility. Where's the fairness in this? I certainly felt like a Victim!

It has been more than a month since my accident, and my life is just now beginning to regain some normalcy. Do I feel resentment toward the other driver? Do I believe this other driver should be held accountable for his irresponsibility? Of course I do. Will the law hold him accountable? On Jan. 19 I found out that the police officer is choosing not to press charges because the driver showed "proof" of insurance at the accident scene. It makes no difference that the document was fraudulent.

It's interesting, from my Christian perspective, how the Spirit works in people's lives, and in this case mine. A colleague of mine, knowing some of the specifics about my car accident, shared with me Bill Nolan's reflection about being a victim. I resonated with it and enjoyed reading it because he's so right-on about the fact that one cannot be a victim forever.

In a society where individualism reigns it is very easy to remain a victim, but I, like Nolan, choose not to because there is so much life to experience beyond the solace of my self-righteousness. I am reminded of a book by John Patton called "Is Human Forgiveness Possible?" Patton concludes his book by stating human forgiveness is indeed possible only when it is authentically understood not as a power one possesses, but rather as a process of discovering that, "I am more like those who have hurt me than different from them. I am able to forgive when I discover that I am in no position to forgive." Nolan is talking about a similar counter-cultural idea.

Shalom,

Fr. Bob Caruso